By Bill McClellan
Of the Post-Dispatch
08/08/2005
Bill McClellan[More columns][Bill McClellan's Biography]
The National Collegiate Athletic Association has announced a crackdown on colleges and universities that have nicknames or mascots connected to American Indians. Eighteen schools were cited. One of them was the University of Illinois, home of the Fighting Illini and mascot Chief Illiniwek. Before discussing this further, let's put things in historical perspective. According to the Illinois Blue Book, published by the secretary of state's office, the first humans arrived in Illinois about 25,000 years ago. The Blue Book refers to them as Paleo-Indians. In the 17th century, a federation of tribes including the Cahokias, Kaskaskias, Mitchagamies, Peorias and Tamaroas met some French explorers. The confederation called itself the Illiniwek, which translates loosely into group of men, and the French referred to the people and the country as Illinois. And Illinois it has remained. So that brings up our first question. If it is politically incorrect to name a team after a Native American federation, is it right to name a state after the federation? Especially when the whole thing is a misunderstanding on the part of the French. None of the tribes were the Illini. Illiniwek was the name of the group of tribes. This is like naming the state Bunch of Tribes. Or, more simply, Bunch. As in, "I grew up in Chicago, Bunch."
Illinois is out. Definitely. Even if you're not offended by the French - and I know our neighbors across the river in Bunch are blue-staters and presumably pro-French - we ought to be sensitive enough to figure that if you can't name a football team after a federation of Native American tribes, you ought not to be able to name a state after the federation. At the very least, let's give it its English name - Bunch. We could try to update it with something more reflective of its present reality. Daleyland has a nice ring. Corrupcio is nice. Moneytalks sounds good. But for now, let's go along with history - Bunch. Now we can deal with the problem facing the University of Bunch. What should its new nickname be? How about the Fighting Jews? I suggest that only because Fighting Irish is already taken. You see, the NCAA is concerned only about the feelings of Native Americans. You can still use other ethnic groups for your nicknames and mascots. To a sensitive person, the Fighting Irish might be particularly bothersome, since you're dealing with an ethnic slur, a stereotype. The drunken Irish, always brawling. Actually, the Fighting Jews is a lot less offensive than the Fighting Irish because Jews are not known for being drunken brawlers. But maybe the university ought to stay away from religion. I like the Fighting Iranians. We could have Ayatollah Khomeini as the mascot. Or the Shah. Or both. Perhaps we should go another direction entirely. Maybe the NCAA will someday get around to other ethnic groups besides Native Americans. So we need a nickname that doesn't involve ethnic groups and has something to do with the state's heritage. We could give a nod to the plaintiff's bar in Madison County. The court system there has become world famous. The Fighting Judicial Hellholes. Can't you just imagine the student section chanting: "We will sue! We will sue!" But what if reform comes to the legal system? That's unlikely, but possible. On that score, the political system will never change, and that really is what the state is most famous for. Does any state have a more colorful history of corrupt politicians? Democrats, Republicans, black and white. I remember when Paul Powell died and there were shoeboxes full of cash in his closet. How does a secretary of state acquire shoeboxes full of cash? George Ryan probably knows. If you go by number of cronies indicted, he was probably the most corrupt secretary of state in Bunch history, and he went on to become governor. On the local level, think of East St. Louis. So that should satisfy the NCAA - the Fighting Corrupt Pols of the University of Bunch. And a mascot will be never be a problem. It will always be the governor.
Of the Post-Dispatch
08/08/2005
Bill McClellan[More columns][Bill McClellan's Biography]
The National Collegiate Athletic Association has announced a crackdown on colleges and universities that have nicknames or mascots connected to American Indians. Eighteen schools were cited. One of them was the University of Illinois, home of the Fighting Illini and mascot Chief Illiniwek. Before discussing this further, let's put things in historical perspective. According to the Illinois Blue Book, published by the secretary of state's office, the first humans arrived in Illinois about 25,000 years ago. The Blue Book refers to them as Paleo-Indians. In the 17th century, a federation of tribes including the Cahokias, Kaskaskias, Mitchagamies, Peorias and Tamaroas met some French explorers. The confederation called itself the Illiniwek, which translates loosely into group of men, and the French referred to the people and the country as Illinois. And Illinois it has remained. So that brings up our first question. If it is politically incorrect to name a team after a Native American federation, is it right to name a state after the federation? Especially when the whole thing is a misunderstanding on the part of the French. None of the tribes were the Illini. Illiniwek was the name of the group of tribes. This is like naming the state Bunch of Tribes. Or, more simply, Bunch. As in, "I grew up in Chicago, Bunch."
Illinois is out. Definitely. Even if you're not offended by the French - and I know our neighbors across the river in Bunch are blue-staters and presumably pro-French - we ought to be sensitive enough to figure that if you can't name a football team after a federation of Native American tribes, you ought not to be able to name a state after the federation. At the very least, let's give it its English name - Bunch. We could try to update it with something more reflective of its present reality. Daleyland has a nice ring. Corrupcio is nice. Moneytalks sounds good. But for now, let's go along with history - Bunch. Now we can deal with the problem facing the University of Bunch. What should its new nickname be? How about the Fighting Jews? I suggest that only because Fighting Irish is already taken. You see, the NCAA is concerned only about the feelings of Native Americans. You can still use other ethnic groups for your nicknames and mascots. To a sensitive person, the Fighting Irish might be particularly bothersome, since you're dealing with an ethnic slur, a stereotype. The drunken Irish, always brawling. Actually, the Fighting Jews is a lot less offensive than the Fighting Irish because Jews are not known for being drunken brawlers. But maybe the university ought to stay away from religion. I like the Fighting Iranians. We could have Ayatollah Khomeini as the mascot. Or the Shah. Or both. Perhaps we should go another direction entirely. Maybe the NCAA will someday get around to other ethnic groups besides Native Americans. So we need a nickname that doesn't involve ethnic groups and has something to do with the state's heritage. We could give a nod to the plaintiff's bar in Madison County. The court system there has become world famous. The Fighting Judicial Hellholes. Can't you just imagine the student section chanting: "We will sue! We will sue!" But what if reform comes to the legal system? That's unlikely, but possible. On that score, the political system will never change, and that really is what the state is most famous for. Does any state have a more colorful history of corrupt politicians? Democrats, Republicans, black and white. I remember when Paul Powell died and there were shoeboxes full of cash in his closet. How does a secretary of state acquire shoeboxes full of cash? George Ryan probably knows. If you go by number of cronies indicted, he was probably the most corrupt secretary of state in Bunch history, and he went on to become governor. On the local level, think of East St. Louis. So that should satisfy the NCAA - the Fighting Corrupt Pols of the University of Bunch. And a mascot will be never be a problem. It will always be the governor.
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