Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Crackberries and other stuff

Most of the guys at our office have those blackberries, which are so excellent for getting in touch with people. I send them messages on them all the time. For convenience they are tops. However, there's a problem with them. All the guys who have them have been turned into zombies. They go around trying to type on the tiny keyboard and walk at the same time. This doesn't work, they aren't capable of walking and typing at the same time. Because their attention is so taken up with what they are doing, they don't perceive that they are clogging up hallways and blocking doors.
I had one of the guys this morning chastise me because he came up to the front door of the office and it was locked. Normally, I buzz people in when I see them coming off the elevator, and the door stays unlocked for long enough for them to walk from the elevator to the front door of the office. So Mr. Blackberry shows up and I pressed the button to unlock the door he stands in front of the door for about thirty seconds emailing before he tries to come in. By this time the door has re-locked itself, and I've gone back to whatever I was doing. So he gets all bent out of shape that I left him out there locked out. Am I supposed to sit here and stare at him through the glass door while he emails whoever about whatever instead of getting my stuff done? Why couldn't he read his emails off his Blackberry and then head quickly to his computer and sit down and start replying to them on a grown-up sized keyboard instead of standing outside the office door wasting my time, and typing at a snail's pace.
I shudder to think that people use these things while they are driving!

In other news, big thanks to the Desperate Housewife and the Ghostbuster for a wicked party last night. I had lots of fun, and lots of food. On the way home, I made the mistake of walking up Church St. The street was closed all the way through the gay village and it was packed with people in costume. The costumes were cool, but I had to squeeze by people, the way you have to at a concert or a crowded bar, for 3 or 4 blocks! Yeesh! It took ages! It was like gay pride in November. No wonder PP likes queers so much, they are the only people who love Hallowe'en as much as she does!

10 comments:

Jennifer said...

Terrible job update:
The assistant to the president of the company just came out and checked his mailbox and found that there was an important fax in there that had been in there from last night. So she gives me hell for not telling her about it. Now here's my question, do you think it's reasonable that it should be my job to check *your* mailbox? Isn't the point of a mailbox to check it yourself?
Now normally I say that in an office, especially in smaller companies, your job is to do what the person who signs your paycheque tells you what to do. But this is even stretching my limits, I'm just not that accomodating.

Jennifer said...

The boyfriend had some very sage and satisfying advice, he says:

Here's what you got to do, write this letter:
Dear : (whatever his name is)

Please remember to check your mailbox for mail.

Sincerly
Jennifer

Then tell him he has something in his mailbox

paul said...

so what was your response? I'm hoping it was something along the lines of 'oh, I'm sorry, I misunderstood. I didn't think I was supposed to read all your correspondence.'

you should email her now every time you put something in her box, whether it be a random cc of a memo or a flyer for the united way. set up a template in your outlook or something, be nice and cheery with NO language that could be misread, and you'll drive her to distraction. if you want to be more diabolical, keep it to "I just put something in your mailbox" or something to that effect so she'll have to check it every time to see if it's important...

paul said...

no! if you write the general letter like that it is evidence of snarkiness, like writing a memo to tell someone to check that his shoelaces are tied. sorry, but I disagree...

Jennifer said...

Well, it's nice to imagine doing both things, but in actuallity, the only part of me that hasn't quit this job is my body. I'm just not engaged enough here to actually yank anyone's chain. Although, Paul, I think you are right, your plan is more maddening and less sarcastic seeming. The only problem is, they'd never in a million years get that I was being a smartass.

Do you guys remember last winter when I worked in a cube farm with a guy who traipsed past my cubicle 50 times a day dragging his heals on the carpet? It used to drive me mental! I was going to take the strings of beads from the Christmas decorations and tie them acrosss the hallway, but really low down, so that anyone picking up their feet wouldn't be tripped by it. I even told my boss who was also driven insane by the foot dragger about my plan. She, being an awesome boss, endorsed the plan whole-heartedly. That was a piece of office-place hilarity.

Jennifer said...

What's the funniest thing you've ever done to yank someone's chain in the office?

paul said...

had the whole national office panicking once before they figured out something was a joke...

Princess Pessimism said...

JENNY....your "wife" is TOTALLY right. He always has such good ideas...I totally think that you should email your boss that message EVERY MORNING. Make it on the top of your to do list. And then when they start to complain about how you keep insutling their intellignece level *LOL* say Okay. Well, What would you have me do then? I got yelled at when I DIDNT tell you to check your mailbox, and you had something, and now i'm getting yelled at for reminding you to check your mailbox.

Then casually ask "How do I win in this situation?"

And you're RIGHT, I do love those boys. and 20 bucks says I pick up at LEAST one gay man this saturday! We are shopping and dining....So my odds are pretty good.

Jennifer said...

PP, I like the term boyf for the boyfriend. What do you think? I think it's kinda cute.
And I've upgrated you from the level of fag hag, to fruit fly.
Paul, you must tell me about this joke that caused such a panic. If not on the blog, then email me.

I once changed everyone's phone names to their behind the back office nickname. So when they called eachother it came up on the call display. They all thought that it must be the boss because no one new I had the password to change phone settings. I walked by just as they were all headed in there like a lynch mob to do I don't know what, I had to make a quick descision, let them all attack the unsuspecting-but-very-vendictive-and-quick-to-fire-people boss *or* tell them it was me and suffer the consequences.

Princess Pessimism said...

Jenny - Remember that scene in Amelie, when she does all that stuff to the grocer's house? Reprograms all of his speed dials....Thats you.